UNDERstanding UNDERwear is no simple UNDERtaking. Yes, I get the purpose for wearing UNDERwear, but the fashion rules for UNDERwear apparently are OVER my head.
Back when I was growing up, the fashion guidelines for UNDERwear were quite straightforward. It was to be worn UNDER clothing and was not to be seen. A fashion faux pas occurred if any UNDERgarment was visible to the public. Students in my class were mortified if their underwear showed. No one wanted to hear the taunting words of “I see London, I see France. I see someone’s underpants!”
My how times have changed. Not only is having one’s underwear on display to the public not an embarrassment, people intentionally flaunt their drawers for the world to see. The prefix -UNDER is meaningless.
I thought fashion had hit rock bottom (no pun intended) when males intentionally started to wear their pants pulled low to reveal a portion of what was under them. It cannot be half as difficult for women to totter about in high heels as it is for men to waddle down the street without their pants dropping even lower to end up around their ankles. This fashion trend takes the catch phrase “let it all hang out” to the ridiculous extreme.
If men really want to flaunt their undies so badly, perhaps they should consider modeling underwear for a living. A shot of a man wearing nothing but underwear would be much more palatable than a view of him flashing undies several inches above the top of his jeans. There’s something alluring about wearing only underwear. I met a guy in college who I was told had appeared as an underwear model in a Sears catalog. I put my foot in my mouth and told him that I may have seen him in the catalog, but I wouldn’t recognize him with his clothes on. Er….Did I really just say that to him? (Imagine sound of hand slapping forehead.)
Who’d have thunk that women would sink as low or lower than the men when it comes to exhibiting garments meant to be kept under wraps? Apparently the latest fashion trend is for women to sport sheer outfits which leave nothing to the imagination as to what lurks below the clothing surface. If she’s wearing granny panties, it sure isn’t a pair that Granny would be caught dead in where it could be seen by every Tom, Dick and Harry on the street.
From what I’ve seen in the media, celebs are the main (and hopefully only) ones flaunting their underwear. I understand that a celeb’s career is tied to public exposure, but I don’t think that the exposure that was meant was a literal exposure. I’m sorry, but if you are a rich celebrity and can afford to drop lots of dough on trendy outfits, be sure to get your money’s worth and purchase clothing which has enough material on it to prevent the undies from being seen. To put it in belly button terms, underwear should be innies and not outies.
Celebs can start fashion trends. For example, when Princess Kate wears a particular frock, the item is sold out within minutes of being publicized. Of course, Princess Kate would NEVER wear any outfit purposely revealing her undies because Queen Elizabeth would have the younger royal’s head on a chopping block forthwith. Kim Kardashian, who would likely consider herself American royalty, seems to flaunt her undies on a regular basis. While other celebs such as Melanie Griffith have hopped on the dare to bear your underwear train, I am praying that the average Jane on the street will not follow suit.
There’s something to be said for leaving a little to the imagination. It’s more fun to play the guessing game of what a beautiful woman is or is not wearing in terms of unmentionables. Guess we can’t call them unmentionables anymore. When celebs stroll the red carpet with visible undergarments, their unmentionables get plenty of press and discussion. In my book, the trend to show it all leads not only to TMI (stylc, color, cut, etc. of the underwear photographed) but also to TMU (too much unentionables).
Mercifully, this fashion trend has not crossed over into the political sphere. Dirty laundry from the candidates’ backgrounds may be on display, but their underwear hasn’t been exposed. Donald Trump may say what’s on his mind and let it all hang out, but that’s only figuratively. He’s not had undies hanging out of his expensive tailored suits. Hillary Clinton may have a closet full of pantsuits, but we’ve never gotten a glimpse of what she has in her underwear drawer. If she wins, can speculation about her presidential panties be far behind (no pun intended)?
I say that we should go back to the dark ages–at least when it comes to underwear. Let’s keep the unmentionables unmentionable by keeping UNDERwear UNDER our clothing. If we see London and France, it should only be because passports, and not panties, are being displayed.
WONDER-ing WOMAN -- Alice H. Murray 