Ice is one of the top news stories right now, and I am not referring to what’s on the roadways as a result of the current blizzard. I’m talking about the ice a guy buys for his beloved. In particular,tongues are wagging about the colossal diamond in the engagement ring Mariah Carey received from her billionaire boyfriend, now fiancé, Australian businessman, James Packer.
The rock in question is not really a rock; it’s a boulder weighing in at 35 carats and costing about $7.5 million. In the abstract it is hard to visualize the size of a diamond that big. Let’s put it into perspective. The average diamond in an engagement ring is only 1 carat. Kim Kardashian’s diamond engagement ring was 15 carats. Probably the most famous diamond in the world, the Hope Diamond, which has a rare blue color and is on display at the Smithsonian, is 45.52 carats. The bottom line is that Ms. Carey, soon to be Mrs. Packer, has a massive gem on her ring finger.
Once we’ve picked our jaws up off the floor about the number of Ms. Carey’s carats, let’s think seriously about this gift from the (current) love of her life. A diamond engagement ring is meant to be a token of love, a tangible representation of the man’s love and the couple’s commitment to be married. Maybe it is just me, but a 35 carat, $7.5 million engagement ring smacks of Mr. Packer’s closing a huge business deal, not presenting his girlfriend with a sweet sentiment of his deep feelings for her. Is Mariah being married or bought? Is Packer planning a wedding or a merger?
When it comes to a diamond in an engagement ring, size is not the ultimate consideration. It is the thought behind the gem that is. I’d rather my man be counting the ways he loves me than the number of dollars that he spent buying me a bauble. An engagement is supposed to signify romantic love and not conspicuous consumption. Putting an engagement ring on the finger once believed to contain a vein leading to the heart is sweet. Putting a ridiculously gigantic engagement ring on that finger because you can is showing off.
Now I am not just pointing my ring finger with an average size diamond engagement ring on it at Mr. Packer or men in general. Let’s face it. Mr. Packer and Kanye West wouldn’t be plunking down big, big, big bucks for bling for their woman if said women weren’t sending the message that BIG bling was wanted/expected. Why Mrs. West (better known as Kim K.) even took to her website to discuss how she’d really like to receive a ($1 million) diamond choker as a push present for presenting her hubby with baby #2. Push is the right word here and not as relates to the baby. Let’s push the man in your life to buy you ice, ice, baby.
While diamonds are supposed to be a girl’s best friend, they really are no friend at all. A friend is one with whom you share a bond of mutual affection. If a diamond is your best friend, you are enamored of things and things for yourself. If the size of the diamond you receive is evidence of how much you think your fiancé loves you, then you are comparing apples and oranges. Diamonds are merely things. Love is an emotion shared with another human being which is not predicated on or measured by the presentation of bling. A diamond is the hardest known natural material. If your heart is set on diamonds, then it is a hard, cold heart indeed.
The word diamond comes from a Greek word meaning “unbreakable.” If men spent as much time and money on preparing for an enduring marital relationship as they did on picking out the perfect ring, maybe marriages would be less breakable. If women demanded more character and values out of their future husbands than they did big bucks on bling, then they might find a gem in their mates and not just on their fingers.
Let’s make sure when it comes to marriage that the diamonds are the only things being bought. Marry your best friend; don’t marry the man who gave you a best friend for your finger.
WONDER-ing WOMAN -- Alice H. Murray 